Six Lines Productions is proud to present an early draft of the upcoming manga series Bad Guys Need Flowers. The author (who would like to remain nameless and is NOT Tom Selleck) expects it to be on shelves early next year(s). It will have more pictures then, and less words, to everyone's delight.
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Do you want to work in a fast-paced, exciting environment?
Are you ready for an upbeat job experience?
Do you love the prospect of completing team-oriented projects?
Calvin knew the answer to all of these questions. He always had known the answer. He always will know the answer.
Of course, the answer was “no.”
“Are there really people excited by these type of job postings?” Calvin asked himself. “And if there are, how much do these people suck?”
Having earned a masters degree in International Relations, Calvin had been browsing job listings for almost two months now. Very little caught his eye, and those jobs that did seem interesting coincidentally also always featured black holes: He’d send in an application, and it would never be heard from again.
It was a Friday night, some time in the fall, in some suburb in the Midwest. A nebulous setting, perhaps, which is how Calvin looked at it as well. Maybe some of his friends would be going out on this weekend eve. Calvin could care less. Every night is the weekend for the unemployed, and he was bored by all that anyway. College had not only disillusioned him to the real world, it had disillusioned him to partying. More on that later. For now, Calvin could be found sitting in his parents’ house, in his bedroom-cum-office, scanning the internet for some glimmer of opportunity to save him from the darkness of normal employment.
And that’s when he saw it - it being an ad on some second-tier Craigslist site which proffered the possibility to “Make Money While Being Bad.” Huh. What exactly this meant was impossible to figure out without clicking for more info, so Calvin inched his mouse towards the link. Despite its intrigue, he mostly expected the result to be some kind of half-assed marketing scheme, hidden beneath a semi-interesting tag. Still, ideas began to swirl in Calvin’s mind. What if he had stumbled upon some kind of awesome double-agent job? What if this were a real Fight Club, ready to bring about the destruction of the corporation? What if he could become a vampire and have blood orgies? Weird and illogical thoughts brewed – thoughts that, after a few seconds if introspection, Calvin would never really wish for – but, at this moment, bad seemed good.
Bad was exciting. Bad was upbeat. Bad was team-oriented, maybe, in some cool, evil society kind of way. Whatever. Calvin clicked.
A second's pause, and then utter destruction. The monitor burst apart at every pixel, megabytes becoming minibytes, plus whatever other technobabbly metaphor could be used to describe a computer completely exploding. Because Calvin had appropriately been where his eyes needed to be in order to view the screen (aka close), the explosion led to some problems. The force knocked Calvin clear across the room where his body - littered with cuts from the various mechanical shards erupting out of what was a reasonably-priced computer – crumpled to the ground. Losing blood, Calvin’s vision faded into haze. He was out, too unconscious to enjoy the spectacle which seemed to be occurring.
The explosion was starting to reverse, as were Calvin’s wounds. Or at least it seemed that way.
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More to come! For now, enjoy this radio advertisement.
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